These aren't mine, but I'm passing them on for a laugh or to provoke thought....
1. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
2. Was learning cursive really necessary?
3. Bad decisions make good stories.
4. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
5. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
6. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with alcohol than Kay.
7. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
8. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
9. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning theTail on the Donkey - but I'll bet that everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
